If you’ve ever had a major operation you know there is an increase in pain a few days post-surgery. The anesthesia that was delivered into your system, so that what needed to be cut into and explored, repaired, removed or realigned could be, has worn off. A couple days later, the undeniable realization that your insides have been worked on has hit, punctuated by each sharp wince or dull ache that is still in need of pain management.
It seems to me that America has undergone a major operation. The post-surgery pain has been intense.
So has the pain in my heart. Afresh, I find that living as a witness of the Lord Jesus among godlessness is like a scalpel that pierces both my flesh and my heart – my wellspring of life. The first, to cut away that which is death to me if and when I operate in it, even as I simultaneously observe it rising up in others in dark shades of ugliness and selfishness that I no longer desire to embrace. The latter, to unveil in me more Christ-life that more fruit may be borne and remain. Holy Spirit is a keen surgeon after good fruit that will last.
For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword,
it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow;
it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.
Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight.
Everything is uncovered and laid bare
before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.
Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens,
Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess.
For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses,
but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin.
Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence,
so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
Hebrews 4:12-16 NIV84
I’ve been needy lately. Last Friday and Saturday following the election were not good days. This wellspring’s water was ‘murkified’ from the atmosphere in the environment around me, not because of who was or wasn’t elected for I know Whom I have believed. Rather, because of reactions, of which there were many.
Personally, I felt weepy with tears hovering at spill level. So, so tired like my plug had been pulled. Listless and disinterested in much of anything but some quiet, except for occasional internal bursts of ‘like a boss mom’ reactions. I didn’t sleep past 2:30 the first night trying to wrap my head around the parenting skills of all the generations alive today.
Then I remembered I was one of those parents and yes, the offspring of the former generation too. I’ve experienced and done my share of screw ups that impacted my own children. It’s true you reap what you sow, both godly and ungodly. Now I watch my own big family, including natural and spiritual offspring, navigating life’s landmines as I had to do at their age. I got so many things wrong and few things right because too much of me and too little of Christ was in the forefront of this very human vessel. Circumstances today may be increasingly different than my generation wrestled with, but human nature and hearts are not.
It’s why I need Jesus. It’s why any of us need Jesus.
Some sense of saving grace was reinstated when my husband talked me down off the “I failed as a mother” ledge. Followed by learning that the ones who initially turned the Rose City’s peaceful protests into a riot were self-proclaimed anarchists who came from other places with the premeditated purpose of stirring up already high emotions, wielding violence, and engaging in intentional destruction of property. This wasn’t the first such occurrence in the U.S. Think Ferguson, Missouri. Now, recent news reports that many of the protesting Portland residents arrested didn’t vote or weren’t registered to vote.
It won’t be the last such occurrence either, this new low.
The war’s already been won but the battle that every generation fights in its own time rages on,
because “…our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.“ 1
Those whose hearts and feet are swift to destruction, chaos and murder do not know the salvation of Jesus Christ. Such a heart was found in Cain, firstborn son of the earth. Such a heart still exists these days, which are becoming more ‘as in the days of Noah’-like with every sunrise and sunset.
Our collective saving grace is that salvation and redemption still exist today too because, believe it or not, God’s desire is that no one perish, but that all should come to repentance. The Lord of the promise is not slow, as some understand slowness.2
During times like these, though, some of us wish He’d get a move on. Then in the next moment, we’re glad He is patient beyond all patience while it is still Today for a great world harvest waits in the wings.
As believers in Christ Jesus we are part of that harvest:
“And now what do I have here?” declares the LORD. “For my people have been taken away for nothing, and those who rule them mock,” declares the LORD.
“And all day long my name is constantly blasphemed.
Therefore my people will know my name;
therefore in that day they will know that it is I who foretold it. Yes, it is I.”
How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace,
who bring good tidings, who proclaim salvation, who say to Zion, “Your God reigns!”
Listen! Your watchmen lift up their voices; together they shout for joy.
When the LORD returns to Zion, they will see it with their own eyes.”
Isaiah 52:5-8 NIV84
If, like me, your wellspring is somewhat murky and your beautiful feet and heart are in need of a bath, I encourage you to immerse yourself in the Word that is living, active and sharp with grace.
Returning morning after morning these past several days is the only way this watchman on the wall has been able to return to joy from the burdens of the night. When we seek Him, we find Him.
May we give heed to our heart and take care of our feet for where the one leads, the other follows. We have mountains on which to stand, proclaiming to fellow believers everywhere, “Your (our) God reigns!”
It’s post-surgery. Time to stand up on cleansed, beautiful feet and heal forward. The world is watching this patient.
~ Gracefully Free
‘Is she done yet?’ 🙂
1 Ephesians 6:12 │ 2 II Peter 3:9 Literal │ 3 Luke 17:22-27
Donna Kuhn says
Nancy,
Through the LORD’s mercies we are not consumed,
Because His compassions fail not.
They are new every morning;
Great is Your faithfulness.
“The LORD is my portion,” says my soul,
Therefore I hope in Him
Jeremiah felt needy and weepy, too.
He is our hope.
See you tomorrow.
Donna
Nancy Bentz says
Thank you, Donna. I’ve long felt like a ‘Jerenancyiah’. No loss of hope, just some of those “I need Jesus right now!” days. Grateful for you. See you tomorrow and looking forward to it!
Paula Whiting says
…best yet of the “Trilogy”… I LOVE ISAIAH…!!
Thanks for being you…p.
Nancy Bentz says
Ah, thanks for the encouraging word, Paula! I love Isaiah too. The trilogy will continue 🙂 Hugs to you.